Love Harder

I promised you all an update and so finally, I have something to talk about! It might sound a bit dorky by the way, but awk well!

Last Semester I took a module entitled "Love Poetry". The first lecture in this module was about the stages of love and the types of love. Some of these might be pretty obvious to you, friend love, family love etc. However, our module went a bit more in depth right to Erotic Love and Idealistic Love and Romantic Love. As interesting as that is, I am here to talk about the three most identifable stages of love, which are: Lust, Passion and Attachment and in that order.

The theory goes, that when you first meet a person you find attractive, you lust after them, which is pretty obvious. At this stage of love, hormones named testosterone and estrogen are released, which is also pretty obvious.There isn't much to say about this stage of love, it's obvious, we find a person we are attracted to, we lust/desire to have them and develop a relationship with them and we try our hardest to make this happen. Without lust, we might not find someone special but it is our desire for more intimate relations that lead us to passion.

Passion is the second stage of love. When we fall passionately in love (which occurs more frequently in men believe it or not) we are said to be blind. We are unaware of all of our partner's flaws. We fall head over heels, blindly, passionately in love with each other. We idealize our partner and we can't get them off our minds. In this stage, partners get to know each other on the most easiest and most intimate of levels and if after that, they decide that a relationship is worth pursuing, the third stage of love is then entered into.

Attachment then, is the third stage of love. When we have fallen in love with a person, we have gotten past the passion and intimacy and have reached a comfortable level in our relationship with each other. It is this stage of love that is most difficult, it is when arguments arise and the relationship needs to be strong enough to withstand problems in order to continue. It should also be noted, that in this stage of love, oxytocin, vasopressin and endorphins are released in our brains, which are also chemicals that come from having sexual intercourse that make us happy.

I know that all sounds like a bit of a lecture. But I found it quite interesting to note that we all fall into different stages of love. I admit here and now that I have been in all 3 stages of love. I am currently still in two - lust and attachment and it so happens, it's with two different people. It's complicated for me to be attached to one person, to not want to let them go because I am secure with where I am with them and at the same time, be lusting after someone else. This is a normal situation by the way, during my studies, I read manys a poem from sappho to ovid about how they were married and attached to their life partners and yet lusted after mistresses and things. So there you have it, next time you find yourself feeling loved up, you'll be able to understand the reasons why, or what stage of love you happen to be in and you might find you are in more than just one.

I am no expert on love, I just wanted to share what I have learnt from my studies - my degree had to come in useful somewhere haha. But from experience, having experienced love once (mainly passionate love) I admit to you that love is strong and complicated and powerful and it's a mess. But it is also something great and nice and amazing and hopefully one day, myself and the people around me will fall in love with someone who loves us back and loves us completely, for who we are.

And while I am on the topic of love, I want to bring your eyes to the title of this post - 'Love Harder'. I am not a big person on the blogging scene as you know, but I am an avid reader of regular blogs, such as Hope Dies Last and Hayley G Hoover which are two very unique and interesting bloggers. However, I happened to be a regular reader of a blog entitled "It's like I'm...mmmagic!". The writer of that blog is called Brandy and she is in love with a H.A.D (Hot Awesome Dude). Recently, her H.A.D. has been diagnosed with multiple myeloma. This is devastating news for Brandy and H.A.D and just before Christmas she made a plea to all of her blogger friends who in turn set up a website entitled Love Harder. I encourage you all to click here and read her story and if you fancy it, make a donation, buy a hoody or a t-shirt, or a mug. As for me, when I decide whether I want a new hoody or t-shirt, I'll make a purchase too!

In conclusion readers, I say this, Live, Laugh and Love Harder because you never know what lies around the corner!

Sami
xo

Sami Needs Something!

Okay, so yes, I know, I'm a bad blogger. It's been like 24 days and I still haven't managed to come up with something interesting to write about.

I haven't been doing anything interesting enough to make a blog worthy post. In the last 24 days, I've slept way too much, ate lots of unhealthy foods, played Farmville way too much, did two exams and really, that's about the height of it.

So, if you want me to write about my days on farmville and documenting food I like to eat that is about 20 000 calories more than my body should intake, then sure, I'll do that.

But really? What are you guys wanting to know about? I know the whole point of a blog is to write something interesting, to share your thoughts and ideas and opinions. But I just don't have any right now...kinda, sorta, maybe. I mean of course I do, but they aren't interesting enough for blogging about.

So reply, give me things to talk about and I'll talk about them :P.

I promise though, my routine goes back to normal on Monday, so I'll try and post weekly from then on :D (just, don't hold me to that, k?).

2010.

Well I know my update have been of the non existent variety lately, that's because its been the holiday season and I've been doing sorts of festive things and catching up with family and friends.

I was going to write this entry as a review of the decade, of the last 10 years of my life but I had trouble remembering all 10 of them and what I had been doing each year. So to generalise what I have done is, fall in love, fall out of love and have my heart broken, lost friends, made friends, reconnected with old friends, passed GCSEs and A Levels, changed schools, met other men, went to University, moved into my own house with my own housemates, got drunk, had sex with men I shouldn't have, thrown way too many parties, almost got kicked out of my house, cried, laughed and enjoyed life.

So there you have it, stuff I have done over the last decade and of course, tonight I am going to another party to kick off 2010 in style, or so I hope haha. 2009 hasn't been the best year for me or very many people I know and so I just wanted to post and wish everyone a better and happier 2010.

Happy New Year!
Sami
xo

p.s. I also managed to tick off one of my 21 things on the list below, yay!

21 By 21.

So, I know I'm not the most regular blog poster ever, but hey, It was the end of semester and I am sick. I've also been racking my brains lately for something to write about it when it occured to me that next year, I am going to be 21 and that's a significant age in anyone's life. So I came up with the idea of having a list of 21 things I want to do by the time I'm 21. So then I spent days racking my brains with things to put on the list and tonight, I finally finished it. Most of them are feasible ideas, I should hope. So wish me luck. Here's the list!

1. Learn to Drive
2. Get a Job
3. Be able to play Expert on Guitar Hero
4. Write something publishable
5. Make a new friend
6. Reconnect with an old friend
7. Read 50 Books (and subsequently, post the finished list here)
8. Make a photo album containing photos of friends and fun times.
9. Keep a notebook of quotes that I like that I have heard/read throughout the year.
10. Get another tattoo
11. Save £1000
12. Visit another country
13. Get an O2 number
14. Master one recipe to perfection and post it as a blog!
15. Buy something from a designer label (Prada? Jimmy Choo?)
16. Go to a concert of a band I enjoy listening to.
17. Learn to speak a different language or how to play an instrument.
18. Go on a proper date (like, for dinner, with a boy I like and whom likes me :P)
19. Have a spa day with someone.
20. Try and have a successful blog with readers that comment (who are more than just my personal friends and family).
21. Fall in Love (Here's hoping!)

Did I mention, I'm 21 next September? So I have like nine and a bit months from when this blog post goes out! Haha. I promise now that I'm getting better and have more time on my hands, I will post more regularly, or well, I'll try! :P

Sami
xo

Let's Play A Game.

I am not going to waste a post introducing myself, from the offset, it's pretty obvious that my name is Sami. So there you have it, I am Sami. The other two details that you need to know are this: I am 20 years old and I am a student at University. Not that you have those important key points, feel free to judge me any way you wish.

Moving on, you'll be suprised that it's currently 2am and I've been designing and setting up this blog for the past four hours. I think it's pretty nifty. Alas though, you ask, why up so late or early? Whichever way you like to see it. The answer to that question my friends, is this, I am a student and thus, last night instead of going to bed, I sat up all night with three of my good friends (two of which I live with) playing icebreakers such as 'Jimmy Whoops', 'The Triangle Game' and 'The Picnic Game'. I don't know if they are actually named that, but that's the names I have given them, so they'll do. I can't tell you how to play the first two unless I'm standing infront of you but I can definitely play the Picnic Game with you.

Since they are called icebreaker's and that they are meant to break the ice, I think starting this blog with one is rather appropriate. So, here are the rules of the game:
1. The aim is to figure it out yourself.
2. If you do figure it out, don't let anybody else know the answer because they'll kick themselves when they get it and that is technically the whole point of the game.

So, let's play.

I am going to a picnic and I'm bringing Strawberries, what are you bringing?