Love Harder

I promised you all an update and so finally, I have something to talk about! It might sound a bit dorky by the way, but awk well!

Last Semester I took a module entitled "Love Poetry". The first lecture in this module was about the stages of love and the types of love. Some of these might be pretty obvious to you, friend love, family love etc. However, our module went a bit more in depth right to Erotic Love and Idealistic Love and Romantic Love. As interesting as that is, I am here to talk about the three most identifable stages of love, which are: Lust, Passion and Attachment and in that order.

The theory goes, that when you first meet a person you find attractive, you lust after them, which is pretty obvious. At this stage of love, hormones named testosterone and estrogen are released, which is also pretty obvious.There isn't much to say about this stage of love, it's obvious, we find a person we are attracted to, we lust/desire to have them and develop a relationship with them and we try our hardest to make this happen. Without lust, we might not find someone special but it is our desire for more intimate relations that lead us to passion.

Passion is the second stage of love. When we fall passionately in love (which occurs more frequently in men believe it or not) we are said to be blind. We are unaware of all of our partner's flaws. We fall head over heels, blindly, passionately in love with each other. We idealize our partner and we can't get them off our minds. In this stage, partners get to know each other on the most easiest and most intimate of levels and if after that, they decide that a relationship is worth pursuing, the third stage of love is then entered into.

Attachment then, is the third stage of love. When we have fallen in love with a person, we have gotten past the passion and intimacy and have reached a comfortable level in our relationship with each other. It is this stage of love that is most difficult, it is when arguments arise and the relationship needs to be strong enough to withstand problems in order to continue. It should also be noted, that in this stage of love, oxytocin, vasopressin and endorphins are released in our brains, which are also chemicals that come from having sexual intercourse that make us happy.

I know that all sounds like a bit of a lecture. But I found it quite interesting to note that we all fall into different stages of love. I admit here and now that I have been in all 3 stages of love. I am currently still in two - lust and attachment and it so happens, it's with two different people. It's complicated for me to be attached to one person, to not want to let them go because I am secure with where I am with them and at the same time, be lusting after someone else. This is a normal situation by the way, during my studies, I read manys a poem from sappho to ovid about how they were married and attached to their life partners and yet lusted after mistresses and things. So there you have it, next time you find yourself feeling loved up, you'll be able to understand the reasons why, or what stage of love you happen to be in and you might find you are in more than just one.

I am no expert on love, I just wanted to share what I have learnt from my studies - my degree had to come in useful somewhere haha. But from experience, having experienced love once (mainly passionate love) I admit to you that love is strong and complicated and powerful and it's a mess. But it is also something great and nice and amazing and hopefully one day, myself and the people around me will fall in love with someone who loves us back and loves us completely, for who we are.

And while I am on the topic of love, I want to bring your eyes to the title of this post - 'Love Harder'. I am not a big person on the blogging scene as you know, but I am an avid reader of regular blogs, such as Hope Dies Last and Hayley G Hoover which are two very unique and interesting bloggers. However, I happened to be a regular reader of a blog entitled "It's like I'm...mmmagic!". The writer of that blog is called Brandy and she is in love with a H.A.D (Hot Awesome Dude). Recently, her H.A.D. has been diagnosed with multiple myeloma. This is devastating news for Brandy and H.A.D and just before Christmas she made a plea to all of her blogger friends who in turn set up a website entitled Love Harder. I encourage you all to click here and read her story and if you fancy it, make a donation, buy a hoody or a t-shirt, or a mug. As for me, when I decide whether I want a new hoody or t-shirt, I'll make a purchase too!

In conclusion readers, I say this, Live, Laugh and Love Harder because you never know what lies around the corner!

Sami
xo

Sami Needs Something!

Okay, so yes, I know, I'm a bad blogger. It's been like 24 days and I still haven't managed to come up with something interesting to write about.

I haven't been doing anything interesting enough to make a blog worthy post. In the last 24 days, I've slept way too much, ate lots of unhealthy foods, played Farmville way too much, did two exams and really, that's about the height of it.

So, if you want me to write about my days on farmville and documenting food I like to eat that is about 20 000 calories more than my body should intake, then sure, I'll do that.

But really? What are you guys wanting to know about? I know the whole point of a blog is to write something interesting, to share your thoughts and ideas and opinions. But I just don't have any right now...kinda, sorta, maybe. I mean of course I do, but they aren't interesting enough for blogging about.

So reply, give me things to talk about and I'll talk about them :P.

I promise though, my routine goes back to normal on Monday, so I'll try and post weekly from then on :D (just, don't hold me to that, k?).